Bubble Wrap

Introduction
Don't you just like it?

The sound, the feeling of popping those bubble wraps.

POP

POP

POP

Isn't that a lovely sound?

POP

POP

POP

The fascinating bubble wrap gives you an experience never like before. You will be enamoured of it! As Mrs Ann says, "Love it, kiss it, marry it." Do as she says (except the marrying part, obviously)!

Bubble wrap, to most people, is ostensibly little more than a transparent plastic material commonly used for packing fragile items, a means to ensure that these goods reach their destination unspoiled. However, they don't know the real reason why bubble wrap came to this world. It is more than just padding to protect precious commodities as they travel through the vagaries of the postal system. It is capable of more - so much more! From stress relief to competitions with your friends, bubble wrap has lots and lots of untapped, unnoticed potential. This item has not been in the light for too long. I hope to bring this under-appreciated material the widespread use it deserves through this post.

Bubble wrap has made an immense contribution to our society. However, most people only play with the devices stored in the bubble wrap. Oh, why can't they ever understand? Indeed, the only ones who seem capable of appreciating Bubble Wrap in all its fascinating glory are children. They will happily unwrap a shiny new toy, cheerfully discard it, and spend quality time with their Bubble Wrap, popping it, squeezing it, pressing it till their fingers start to swell, enjoying the pleasure its unique texture brings.

I shall now show you the benefits of bubble wrap to our civilisation, AND SHOW THOSE SUCKERS HOW GREAT BUBBLE WRAP CAN BE!!! POPPITY POP! Ahhhhhhhhh...

Uses of bubble wrap
Stress Relief
POP.
Isn't the sound relaxing?

Well, if you were the one popping it, you'll feel GREAT.

Somehow, the feeling of you popping makes your head feel like its going to rise. Your head in the clouds, the weight off your shoulders....

Let me compare bubble wrap to... drugs. The same feeling, but a different price to pay.

Popping bubble wrap can give satisfaction, happiness and removal of burdens.

Drugs can cause hemorrhages, decrease in lifespan, anxiety that you will get caught by the police - and if you do get caught, you may have to spend the rest of your days behind bars, which are, unfortunately, made of steel, not bubble wrap.

Told you so.

Erm... decorations?
Your room used to be so dull, so sparse, so concrete-grey, so... boring.

But with a magical touch of bubble wrap, POOF! Your room's now fabulous!

Because of its significant aesthetic properties, it can also be used to brighten up any room!

It's so beautiful. I could stare at it for minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years, centuries and yada yada.

You can gaze lovingly at miles of gently rippling plastic, and even reach out and touch it. The sensuality under your fingertips, even allowing yourself the occasional...

POP.

POP.

POP.

POP.

Ta-dah. Your interior decoration. Decorative and functional.

Conclusion
I hope you have opened your eyes to the beauty of bubble wrap.

Thank you for reading!

By the way, there's a roll of fresh, translucent bubble wrap next to me.

Should I resist the temptation?

Should I?

Should I?

No... I can't... I must... my fingers... reaching out... nearly there...

POPPOPPOPPOP POPPITY POPPITY POPOPOPOPOPOPOPOP...

Ahhhhhhh... Please, leave me in this glorious moment...